Glorious Allah be praised Reg does now have a PS5 all must celebrate on pain of public stoning xoxoo
  • Lord_Griff wrote:
    So why the fuck can't I get one?!
    Get a Series X instead.

    Can't get those either, dammit.
  • Yossarian
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    I’m vaguely considering selling my Quest. It’s not getting much use at the moment.
  • Welcome to today's daily update. Apologies for the delay, I got a stock alert and well what do you know, by the time you put it in the basket it's already gon [lifetime mullah OZNO's mic is cut]
    thank you supreme ayatollah ozno for your thoughts and leadership. apologies to join you all via teams, my name is Gnozathan Van Scam, over.

    We all know there is a lot of fake news circulating out there. I can assure you we are truly all in this together. Rumours that premier Boris already has a ps5 are completely false. He, like all of us, is patiently waiting for his phonecall from the has reg got a PS5 yet national hotline (very ably brought to you from those folks over at Game) before he gets his turn like all of us. Hold on, Mads Gonzcock has his hand up, over.
    Actually Gnoz, premier Boris does have a PS5, as I'm sure we all remember, he had made some comments about how bad Raised By Wolves was, and enjoyed cyberpunk so much we all tried to get him sectione- ahem, urged him to obtain medical advice, and on that professional medical advice he was prescribed a PS5 so he could test his eyesight. We are following the science and of course, we remain very clear, the message is very clear to everybody, that reg does not have a PS5 yet. It's actually quite simple.

    .....



    .....

    "Gnozathan wrote:
    you didn't say over, but I guess I should expect it working for such amateurs.

    Let's move on to another bit of fake news that is doing the rounds.

    First of all, let me be clear. Images circulating on social media of shelves stacked full of ps5s are a total fabrication. Our game stores are not engaging in a conspiracy to pretend there are no PS5s to troll reg into offering his scalp to the game gods, and while I am at it, can I also say that those peddling that malicious rumour should be ashamed of themselves. The NHS is under sufficient strain as it is, it does not need to also handle the hundreds of middle aged men turning up for scalpal reconstruction surgery once they figure out what scalpers actually are after is money. To be clear, and I'm surprised I have to say it. No, scalping yourself will not get you a PS5 on eBay. Yes, reg does not have a PS5 yet. No, there aren't rows and rows of ps5s in stores being covered up.

    It is so important for us all to be wary of fake news, and to remember the facts. Take this footage, for example;
    https://youtu.be/uVIVMxtoZzc

    hundredss of young men ignoring our clear advice that reg does not have a PS5 yet, refusing to stay at home, and in fact staying alert to PS5 stock updates, or reacting to fake news about there being PS5 stock in BT stores. I mean, honestly, how stupid are these guys from, where's this? New Malden by the looks of it. Absolutely irresponsible behaviour.

    Nonetheless, I want to thank the vast majority of badgers who are sensible, law abiding posters, and who every day, fail to stay alert. They stay offline. They save PS5s. For reg, because in the end, it's that simple isn't it. We all know it, we feel it deep inside. Reg does not have a PS5 yet. Over
    Don't wank. Zinc in your sperms
  • bad_hair_day
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    Yossarian wrote:
    I’m vaguely considering selling my Quest. It’s not getting much use at the moment.

    You’re not using it right then.

    retroking1981: Fuck this place I'm off to the pub.
  • Yossarian
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    I’m barely using it at all, that’s the problem.
  • Yossarian wrote:
    I’m barely using it at all, that’s the problem.

    He's not discovered VR porn yet
    Not everything is The Best or Shit. Theres many levels between that, lets just enjoy stuff.
  • bad_hair_day
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    Reg has wizard rig for all those sweet PCVR games too.

    No fucking way I can do VR when there's a baby about to become mobile

    Cordon off a play area with cones, signs and "do not cross tape". If there's one thing an infant child respects it's health and safety

    Also, the problem we had putting baby in a hamster ball is they absolutely launch if hoofed.


    retroking1981: Fuck this place I'm off to the pub.
  • Still no stock haha fucked it
  • regmcfly
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    Matthew wrote:
    Still no stock haha fucked it

    It's a shame that DS doesn't even try anymore
  • regmcfly
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    Look at the effort Gonz puts in and that's what we get. Couldn't even have the Gibraltar flag for an av.
  • Dark Soldier
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    literally fucked the entire thing i was gonna build towards, absolutely killjoy here
  • regmcfly
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    Gotra raise your game. Gonz literally using his work time to write parodies. You seen what a lawyer charges per hour? 6 PS5s or something
  • regmcfly
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    Gonz, I'm waiting
  • regmcfly wrote:
    Gonz, I'm waiting

    For your bill? That will be expensive
  • Welcome to yet another daily update. On behalf of supreme ayatollah Ozno, let me start by saying that we have full confidence in Gnozathan Van Scam. We are aware of scurrilous stories circulating on the web, and particularl on the weird things thread, that Professor Van Scam has a controlling stake in Getrektreg, a private bot fund which has allegedly deployed an army scalping bots buying up all available PS5 stock. Professor Van Scam's scientific expertise has been very invaluable in helping our has reg got a PS5 yet drive. We benefit every day from the expertise he acquired in the online marketplace, going back to a previous badger initiative, for those who remember operation Ring Gav Now, back in the days no one could get Ringfit for never love nor money. He is a veteran of the online scalping scene, going all the way back to super Famicom grey imports. We are glad to have him on our side, fighting the good fight with unerring good humour - that copy of sackboy you asked to be gifted, it's in the post mate. But seriously,a Thanks again, Professor Van Scam, for your dedication - you were absolutely right about the PS5 pad, you really do have to play Astro's playroom to really apprecia--

    er, thank you, Mads. I think we lost Mr Gonzcock there, which goes to show, technical issues can affect all of us. Reg does not have a PS5 yet, everybody. I wanted to start off with the most important message, lest we lose sight of it. But I do want to echo my colleague's endorsement of Professor Van Scam, he really is playing a crucial role in helping us in our fight to find PS5s. For Gav, I mean, because clearly, the most important thing is that Reg does not have a PS5 yet.

    I want to start by addressing some of the concerns expressed after our last daily update. I did indeed promise that reg would have a PS5 by Christmas. But no one could have foreseen the global shortage in stock that we were warned about for months, on almost a daily basis, would mean that, regrettably, reg does not have a PS5 yet. In these unprecedented times, we were always clear that we would be led by the stockists and we are still following the stock, every day - honestly, I'm doing it rn, and let's face the facts, so are you. One can't help it. I don't even want a PS5 but if I find stock, it's like I can't control myself. But it's incredibly important that everybody resists that urge, and remembers that the most important thing is that reg hasn't gor a PS5 yet.

    And I want to say a little bit about what we are doing, in the Grand Vizirate of Education, to help us all in our fight to get a ps5. Criticism of reg for dropping hints on teams to all his students that he still doesn't have a ps5 yet, making weird crying noises occasionally followed by schizophrenic outbursts like the recordings sadly being spread on social media. And yes, while it's true that the remarks like

    "
    if I hear any of you wee shits gannae get one delivered ye all can get tae, I'll fail all yees, your future will be peddling copies of the Digger in the shiteholes like larkhall. Mark my words, you don't get me a ps5 yous can all get get fucked ya wee shits"

    Are less than well-judged, we are all going through a very difficult time. And most of all reg. And that's why it's important to remember that, above all, reg does not have a ps5 yet. And that is why I'm very happy today to announce that every school in Glasgow, and soon in the greater Glasgow region, will now dedicate an hour every day to hunting ps5 stocks for reg. Schools that fail to do this will be turned into BTEC establishments, or downright disbanded.

    For everyone else, don't stay alert. Get oculus. Save PS5s. We. Will. Get. Reg. A ps5

    Don't wank. Zinc in your sperms
  • regmcfly
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    Shan't be VRing but once again fuel for me. My thanks
  • I'm tired just thinking about the next few days. Seriously, please can someone find a ps5 for the man, I'm stuck in a vicious reverse troll over here. He doesn't even wait for the end of lunch hour before chasing. Typical fucking SMT
    Don't wank. Zinc in your sperms
  • Yossarian wrote:
    I’m barely using it at all, that’s the problem.
    He's not discovered VR porn yet

    don't do it yoss, i lasted 2 mins and then joined all of the dating apps
    Don't wank. Zinc in your sperms
  • Has reg got a PS5 today?
  • Curtis
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    Where's my PS5?
  • regmcfly
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    There is still no PS5 in Reg Manor
  • This thread is hardly "Jim will Fix It" is it?

    Disappointing.

    New thread required. Enquiry into why reg doesnt have a PS5 yet.
  • regmcfly
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    I'm fucking delighted it's not Jimll Fix It
  • PS Now then, PS Now then.
  • have some guesstimates when stores might get stock in:
    https://twitter.com/ps5ukstock3/status/1358037330154708992
    "Like i said, context is missing."
    http://ssgg.uk
  • My workplace is giving them away to some employees as end of year bonuses. Saw one person carrying a PS5 box in the elevator just today.

    Reg must try harder.
  • Nina
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    And I just read that Sony China will officially release the PS5 in Mainland China Q2 this year. And that currently most people in china import from elsewhere. So that could have been Reg's PS5 that you saw!

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