Thanks everyone, your words really help. Fortunately she left very clear instructions about the cremation and memorial service. She really thought about every detail. Seeing her peaceful in the hospital bed was emotional but she looked beautiful and would probably have cracked a joke about this diet working wonders for her figure.
I'm going to wear one of her red/purple fascinators and a hawaiian shirt to the service as she would have loved the absurdity of it. She took great pleasure in puncturing societal norms and in her words was "growing old disgracefully".
The plan for the sister is to hire a solicitor to pass on the details of the service and then maintain strict neutrality throughout. She'll likely try to cause a huge scene and make it all about her so the best defence is to be like water and let her do what she does without trying to stop it. 99% of the attendees know exactly what she's like and how she had no relationship with her own mother. I've no doubt she'll contest the will which leaves her bugger all. Unfortunately for her its ironclad and includes a cover note from the solicitor explaining how there are abolutely no grounds to contest it.
RIP Neil Kulkarni. One of the ‘big’ music journalists for my generation. Specialised in hip hop and metal, wrote for Melody Maker, Kerrang, The Quietus, DJ mag and a whole pile of others. Ran the music journalism course at Birmingham Institute of Music.
Met him when he was filming a show called Phoo Action here in Glasgow - my friend was the exec producer on it. He was in O’Henry’s one night after filming and graciously chatted with everybody at the bar all night long. Telling stories about filming Rocky and Predator.