Twitter twa...I mean, chatter (And various social media guff) - The Bear and Badger

mistercrayon

What is the stigma though? That these things need to be public?

It should be damn sad if a baby dies before it is born. Is there an issue about people feeling bad about feeling sad about this? I’m not convinced this sharing into public is really necessary though (I mean maybe it’s necessary if you are a public person but I don’t think it’s generalisable to normal people). Specifically this increasing trend that the only validation of feelings has to be through some public mix of likes and retweets.

poprock

It’s an issue because a lot of women don’t know it’s okay for miscarriage to happen to them too. That they’re not weird. That it’s not their fault. That they’re not alone. That it’s common. Same for men too - that it can happen to your partner - although let’s be clear, us guys are a secondary concern on this one.

I’m not advocating social media as the ideal place to discuss it. Just that it’s kept hidden away when it needs to be an okay thing to talk about.

JMW

Presumably approving and sharing that picture struck me as really bizarre too - it’s great that followers in that situations are potentially helped but ways and means and all that. I think that by the time you’re at that level of celebrity your perspective is thoroughly warped though.

Roujin

What's up men on an internet forum borderline mansplaining how people should cope with their grief or raise awareness of a serious women's health and mental health issue.

If you lot seriously think that was posted to harvest clout and not as a response to all the messages they received and as a means to help other women not feel like they are alone in their grief then you got some wires crossed in your grey matter and you should probably stop viewing the viewing the world through the very narrow, cynical lens of "young people on internet posting pictures are only doing it for the attention"

Dark Soldier

Or perhaps those posting have looked at both sides and have come to that conclusion, rather than just going 'lol cloutchaser'. Not that it appears anyone has said owt about clout.

I discussed it with my partner this morning, her best mate has been through two miscarriages and we can see both sides. Sheer confusion at posting such an intimate image to a teeming froth of Twitter people whilst also agreeing that the message posted is strong and allows others to open up to the stigma that miscarriage can carry. You've essentially just narrowed down that view also, but on the other side of the fence Rouj.

poprock

Roujin wrote:

If you lot seriously think that was posted to harvest clout …

I doubt anyone here thought that. Certainly nobody said it.

mistercrayon

I don’t think it’s about attention but that the normal forum of support is in the public.

To me it makes more sense that if any person goes through this the normal place for empathy would be offline for a couple of reasons.

It seems terrifying that this needs to be raised as an issue by a famous person for people to be nice about it or realise these are horrible situations where the woman shouldnt blame herself.

Roujin

Alright, alright I apologise for the hyperbole on the clout chasing line.

But a lot of the "confusion" people have when things like this happen where people can't get their head around something because "it's not something I would do" is a bit frustrating after a while, especially when it's something like this, and it's us, a bunch of men, giving our reacts from a point of relative ignorance on the topic at hand, especially when the subject is something that's incredibly intimate and difficult for anyone with the misfortune to have had to go through it.

I'm sure it's not something Chrissy Tiegan would have done either, were she not in a position to maybe make discussion around miscarriage not such a closed off issue for a lot of women who are dealing with it.

I get that it was posted on social media, so everyone can see it, but the message behind that tweet and that image is aimed at a group of people who probably really need to feel more like they don't have to suffer on their own, and that it wasn't their fault somehow for what happened.

Diluted Dante

She's someone who lives very publicly on social media. It might seem weird to people who post little or nothing of themselves online, but you live in a different world.

poprock

For Chrissy Teigen, it would have seemed weird if she hadn’t posted about it. The photo is still a stretch of understanding for me personally, but I’m 100% aware that’s on me.

Facewon

Roujin wrote:

, especially when it's something like this, and it's us, a bunch of men, giving our reacts from a point of relative ignorance on the topic at hand, especially when the subject is something that's incredibly intimate and difficult for anyone with the misfortune to have had to go through it.

.

I think you underestimate how many folks here might be able to relate. Given the age and number of parents on this forum Ima say there's plenty of folks who have been through it. (myself included.)

(yes, not the actual physical side. Natch.)

As I said, the message is great, but to think to take a photo at that point and share it is still bizarre to me. (I'll live with being old man who shouts at clouds on this one, Tbh.)

Anyhoo.

Paul the sparky

Yup. Haven't been through it myself, but I can't imagine it being a pleasant experience. So to see someone reach for the camera at such a time is bizarre to me too. Who looks at their partner going through overwhelming despair and thinks wow, this is a kodak moment we'll want to relive in the future?

Diluted Dante

https://twitter.com/BeeBabs/status/1311679030907863041

In many cultures, grief is outward, it's wailing loudly, collapsing on the floor, you feel it out, scream it out, in full view. It's part of the processing. Western culture is so repressed

mistercrayon

Why are you quoting that?

Nina

From what I understand it's not uncommon for nurses in the hospital here to take pictures during moments like that. It's often the only pictures the family will have, and I have feeling the more intimate ones haven't been posted.

Don't really have anything else to add.

SpaceGazelle

I know I really am biased but this thread is not exactly convincing me I'm wrong.

stonechalice

Who the fuck is Chrissy Tiegan

poprock

Ex model. John Legend’s wife. Minor celebrity for being quite good on social media.

Vela

She can post whatever she wants, it's a shit thing to happen.

If it helps someone else going through the same thing to get some time with their baby, photos to remember and help them process the unfairness of having to grieve instead of celebrate a newborn then it is a net good thing to post it.

One of the least offensive things posted on twitter.

afgavinstan

Full agree. Less said about the reaction on Loose Women, the better. Deary me.

Anyway..

g.man

That's a good bit o' fun that. Also on YouTube.

Facewon

https://twitter.com/janecat60/status/1315167642714480640?s=19

Oof. I promise I'm not scouring twitter for these.

This is longer form, not easy reading. Wow.

beano

I think the last time I got a twitter ban was because I wished kanker on afneil but in english...time before that may have been me calling a terf a terf but telling them to shut up with a spiked bat in all their holes which was contrued as rape.

Anyway. Escape has been suspended only his account is private so which one of youse reported him?

Facewon

For what?

Unlikely

Yeah I reported him for loads of stuff so which thing was it?

beano

Hahaha no idea - hoping he'd tell us - it's a maddening one because he has a private account like

beano

I don't even know who's still here tbqh outside of the santa fred I see some familiar names and some not and then more deleted users than I am used to

Roujin

He tweeted 5 hours ago and his account doesn't say it's suspended when I click on him?

Dark Soldier

It said it had been flagged earlier when i clicked on it and to click through if i wanna see his timeline

Roujin

Fine, I admit it, it was me, he keeps posting videos of him bodying my astaroth with his ivy and I couldn't take it anymore.

Howdy, Stranger!

Categories