Funkstain wrote:Sweet page turn
Is there a reason that there are no pictures of what you are actually selling Lester? Other than that it seems sound.LesterUnlimited wrote:Hey guys, I went live with this project this morning. Fierce Edge If anyone would care to critique it, I'd appreciate any feedback at all.
Thanks again for Tiger for helping with the Bounty Hunter narrative!
You sit in the viewing port, watching warp ships’ engines flare as they emerge from the landing bay. Their lights dwindle as the ships disappear into the dark. Venturing into the unknown has never grown old. You remember your first steps into the stars with barely a flak jacket to your name and the first bounty you brought home.
Bringing two fingers to your temple against your helmet you tap twice. Colourful digits appear before you.
++NEURAL INTERFACE ACTIVE / DIAGNOSTICS RUNNING_
++HEARTBEAT: 52BPM. NORMAL.
++BLOOD PRESSURE READING: 112/73MMHG. NORMAL.
++02 SATURATION: 99%. NORMAL.
++TEMPERATURE: 36.2C. NORMAL.
++COMBAT RATING: DEADLY_
“Commander Jameson?” You tap your temple again and the interface vanishes. It's a young freebooter, fresh faced. A recent hire and still bearing a 'Mostly Harmless' rating. “Yes?” “Your ship’s ready.” You rise, a smile growing across your lips. Your E.V.A. enhanced power armour creaks comfortingly, the servos hissing a warning to passers-by. They step back and watch you stride past; few bounty hunters can afford such quality. Adventure and unlimited opportunity awaits you Bounty Hunter. Use your wits, luck, skill and courage and claim the greatness that is yours.
Yes, that. Something that tells you it's a site that sells clothes in the first few seconds would be handy. Preferably at the top of every page, but definitely the main one.AJ wrote:I was utterly confused as to what the products were, maybe you should metion that somewhere more prominent. Unless "compression base-layers" makes sense to people that would buy these shirts, of course. Other than that, pretty good.
LesterUnlimited wrote:I don't know how you creative writers do it. If I budget 3 hours to write a blog, 2 hours of that is dicking around doing everything I can to distract myself from actually writing.
Tempy wrote:I'm not sure I'd ever buy anything from it, but I've given it a like on Facebook because it looks cool.
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