Wouldn't want to see any of the Reading/Leeds lineup.

I'm off to a dodgy cover band festival in Penrith at the end of the month for a laugh. Local ales and Pete Loaf headlining. Can't wait.

Some of the festival line-ups have been announced and I'm a bit underwhelmed.  From the one's I specifically go to, End of the Road has Ty Segall and nowt much else.  Bluedot got Orbital and nowt much else.  Soundcity (Liverpool inner-city 3day festival, not really a festival in the camping sense) has got Velvet Underground.  And here was me thinking Lou Reed died years ago.

Festivals seem to start plugging themselves earlier and earlier now, well in advance of any line-up announcement.  As much as I like all those festival sites, ( particularly Bluedot with the awesome Jodrell Bank telescope) I'm not going to pay a penny until I know who is playing, no matter what discounts they offer for early bird tickets.  And yet people still buy 'em; unfathomable.

Here's hoping Festival No. 6 and Green Man can offer more substantial offerings.

EDIT:  Green Man has announced line-up PJ Harvey and Angel Olsen.  Colour me interested afterall.

I'd love to see Orbital and Pixies at Bluedot, It's an incredible venue. I've not heard of anyone else on the lineup though, so fuck DAT.

Somebody posted this memory on my Facebook - that's a hell of a line-up. They don't make them like that anymore.

Back from Green Man and I have to say it's one of the most beautiful settings that you'd want for a festival.  Surrounded by the rolling hills in the Usk Valley, it's picture postcard perfect. Winding through the towering castle gates of the Glanusk Estate to find a place to pitch me tent, (didn't get there till after 6 in the evening despite starting out at 10am - transport woes),  managed to squeeze in by the fire line. One warm can of larger and a packet of Wotsits later, I was ready to set out to see...

Day 1 :  Kindergarten Coup

Anna Meredith makes music as mad as a box of frogs.  Managed to miss Nautilis, but it was a stormin' set nonetheless. Amid shouts of 'Tuba! Tuba!' from the crowd she gave a heartfelt ‘we’re only got one more song left to play, honest!’, as some folks were obviously left perplexed by the sheer wizardry contained within classical-electronica mash up.  Loved it meself

Getting Ride to headline the first day initially seemed like a bit of coup for the festival’s fifteenth anniversary celebrations. A band that largely passed me by back in their day, and to be honest I still can’t fully fathom their attraction now.  They played some hits (Leave Them All Behind is still a classic) but, christ, they looked old now.  Some of the crowd sarcastically shouted for ‘Wonderwall!’ as  if the plodding dad-rock on display wasn’t pedestrian enough.  Not really my cup of tea.

The modern phenomenon sweeping today’s festival sites appears to be the frightening number of toddlers dragged along by their families who are seemingly bent on not sacrificing their ‘right to party’ to the god of good parenting.  If little Tarquin or Matilda lay half-comatose in their bespoke festival carriages equipped with the best ear defenders that money can buy, then there’s no harm done is there?  I understand that many forumites here have kids, but I ask you, would you bring your 6 / 7 yr olds to a Sleaford Mods gig?  Because Bruno & Breah seem to think to think it’s perfectly acceptable to do so. Cunts.

For a festival that prides itself so much on its green credentials, I found it strange they didn’t have a ‘family planning tent’ with information on how contraception can reduce your carbon footprint.


Day 2: How much Sugar Loaf can you drink before you die?

Had convinced myself that Hinds we’re all looks and no talent, but they produced a set so tight they could barely contain it within their skinny jeans. A band that crafts a loveable arrangement of garage rock tunes that gives them credentials way beyond their label as mere Spanish eye candy. A seemingly endless tour has dulled none of their on-stage cheerfulness or desire to make songs for “people to make love to” as Carlotta Cosials purrs.

Angel Olsen does a fabulous impersonation of white trailer trash.   Keeps us waiting for over half an hour then shimmies onto the stage in her slinky white dress asking whether we’d like to join her for a ‘mud wrestle?’ with reference to the worsening weather outside the Far Out tent.  Yes please!  Her dirty brand of redneck rock is really resplendent stuff and is elevated by her backing band who don’t put a foot wrong all night.  Would see her again in a heart beat.

Spent the first night slagging off  Kate Temptest with a couple of Welsh chaps who were off their face on Sugar Loaf Cider (“we said we’d stay away from it this year!”) – we all agreed that while her lyrical prowess was a thing to be admired, that admiration should generally take place at a safe distance, as her delivery style is grating in the extreme.  Never. Been. So. Wrong.  Caught the last of her set from outside a packed tent and genuinely gutted that I missed her set. Weaving tales of the causalities of broken Britain and tying it all together at 4.18am, it was startling stuff.  Such a different proposition from her records, her live persona is staggering.


Day 3:  Never too old to pogo.

You’ve just flown 26 hours straight to arrive on time at the main stage.  You admit to feeling like a ‘zombie’ but you’re generally thrilled that they’ve given you a ‘real piano!’ to play on as you were expecting something far less.  Then as you start to play, you suffer the indignity of a largely indifferent crowd who seem to be more interested in taking short cuts right past the front of the main stage (why do people do this?!, it’s maddening!).  Those who are taking notice are only there to briefly pose for selfies determined to get you half in shot before fucking off to see if they can remember where they left Tarquin in the healing tent.  I felt really sorry for Jessica Pratt.   Her beguiling song craft seemed lost on the early afternoon crowd.  I was spell bound though, even if most seemed impervious to the magic of her alt-folk.

This is the Kit got a more welcome reception, best summed up by one commentator as ‘Not bad for a posh lass!’.  I still think Neil Smith over eggs things on bass and comes close to drowning out the rest of the band, but hey ho.  One band that doesn’t have to worry about such musical niceties are the Oh Sees, as the two drummers they deploy simultaneously on stage tend to provide ample bombastic showmanship.  I did find the lulls during John Dywer's guitar meandering a bit dreary, but these are but a brief reprieve from the utter sonic carnage that rips through their stage show.   First proper pogo of the weekend too.

Day 4: It’s all about the ‘Mods.

Not catching Richard Dawson properly was among the biggest regrets of the festival.  Just heard him lament on how difficult it is to repair a tendon after skewering it with a Phillip’s Screwdriver – and I was hooked.  Need to track him down again.  Sought out Jason Williamson of Sleafod Mods in the Babbling Tongues Tent to see whether his mesmerising on-stage persona translates well into a Q&A environment.  He came across as quite a nice chap, although seemingly incapable of returning the plaudits that many of his contemporaries had given him, wary of  appearing too “matey”.  Biggest LOLs came when some small child asked “how many times in your life have you sworn?”  Although he missed a golden opportunity to retort with ‘shut it you f*cking c*nt!’ Thankfully, the machine-like quality in which he spits out lyrics live on stage though has lots of none of its charm.

If they can conjure up another line up as stella as this, I’ll be back next year definitely.   All hail the Green Man.

Cracking post that Blocks.

Aye, been to a couple of Green Mans, last one a fair few years ago now, would love to return one day. Great family friendly festival, the Mods notwithstanding, and enough space so the little bleeders don't get under your feet, kids that is, not Mods. Small, 10-15 thousand people, diverse music, great food and drink, and no Radio 1.

Ooh. Orbital were great last year as always, that'll be ace. The Breeders too, lucky boy.

They've just released a new album (that I've not listened to, but the title track was great) and all the prior albums were good and well received?

FJM being so low down is surprising though.

He's great, fourth album out later this year.

Blocks100 wrote:

I'll be going back next year if they get Kraftwerk and CHEMICAL BROTHERS obviously.

The 'Brothers were last year (and were splendid), but as per my prediction three years ago,  those Kraut electronic pioneers will finally be landing at Jodrell Bank, Bluedot this year.   Along with New Order and Hot Chip.  Quite the line up.  Do Bernard Sumner and the boys tend to stick to New Order stuff live, or do they bang out a few Joy Division numbers too?

It's about this time of year that festivals start firming up their line-ups.  Any that have piqued your interest?

    

Really tempted by Bluedot. Thing is I've seen Kraftwerk do their 3D show, and I've seen New Order with Hooky, so I'm not sure I can justify the price. If I'd never seen Kraftwerk I'd be all over it.

.... That show at Jodrell Bank though. Hnnnnnn...

Meredith Supernatural Amphitheater - best festival site name evar.   Imagine my disappointment though upon discovering that 'DJ Harvey' was infact not a typo.

Katie Price's kid?

Marlon has a Tic Tac head.