Well obviously, thats why new drivers have higher insurance premiums.

Sorry guys, I know I'm being a bit of a jackass here.

You can tell I think a lot about this car stuff, huh?

Hahaha.

afgavinstan wrote:

You can tell I think a lot about this car stuff, huh?

It’s actually ace seeing how excited you are.

Okay, let’s talk incidents. Crashes. Bumps and scrapes.

(I guess this is where a trigger warning goes, for anyone who’s actually had a serious shunt and may not want to take part. I mean no offence with anything here, and I know it might be an insensitive subject for some. Er … tl;dr just tell me to shut up if you like.)

As a teenage driver I had a sweet little Rover Metro. Actually I had a lot of them. My Dad and Stepmum both had company cars, despite working (and commuting) together. So my Stepmum deliberately took a wee hatchback for me to use. Which was really lovely of her. But it meant I got a brand new one every three months or so, which was mental as a 17/18 year old. Anyway, at this point I had the 1.4 Gsi with all the toys, and I lived in the countryside, so I drove it like the typically overenthusiastic young driver that I was. And, one summer evening, on one of my regular local twisty little roads, I overdid a corner. Single track road, deep ditches on either side before fields of oilseed rape. Hairpin bend. I went in too fast, locked up the brakes with too much turn on the wheel and I span. Pirouetted. I was convinced I was going into a ditch. But no! Perfect 540º right in the middle of the road and a dead stop facing the other way. Brown trousers but no harm. And no witnesses. Thank fuck. I learned from that. Now I knew the limits of dry grip in a Metro on factory tyres.

Cut to New Year’s Eve the same year. Parents out on the lash. Home alone. I took the wee Metro out to pick up a girl and take her out for the night. Except I didn’t. Because I reversed out of the drive and turned the wheel too early. I smacked the front right corner off a gatepost. Smashed the headlight to pieces. No bodywork damage, thankfully, just the light. So I phoned my Dad, because it wasn’t really my car. He was already a few drinks in, so he was very chilled about it. “Put a bit of tape over the broken headlight and just go into town anyway. Hope you don’t get pulled over. See you tomorrow.”  My Dad’s ace. 

Those were my only ‘new driver’ gaffes. Oh – except for the one time I forgot to put the headlights on at night. Made it all the way into the big city (Hull) before a Policeman crossing the road in front of me banged on the bonnet and pointed at my lights. Oops. Again, bit embarrassing in front of the girl in the passenger seat I was trying to impress at the time.

Christ.. Bare in mind I've worked in the motor trade since 1993 so spend more time in cars and doing manoevures than most of you I'd guess.

But where to begin? Writing off a Pug 405 and then causing a pile up because I turned the lights off to save the battery in a pitch dark country lane?

Getting out of a land rover freelander automatic to answer the phone and not getting it properly in park and watching it reverse itself out of the showroom, pull the drivers door of it's hinges and reverse straight for a line of used cars?

Or the time I started a smart car in the showroom and it just began driving, I didn't even have my seat belt on.. it drove itself out of the showroom and a i managed to avoid the first few only to pile into my bosses nearly new BMW i8 at a speed fast enough (obvs I wasn't watching the speedo when an i8 was filling the windscreen) to cause the top of my head to get gashed when it hit the windscreen.

First time I broke traction in a Porsche was a revelation. “Oh right. That’s the difference between a proper sports car and the stuff I’ve been used to until now.”

You know when you take a car just past it’s limit of grip? When you feel it starting to slide at speed, and you know that you’ve lost control – even just for a microsecond? In a normal road car, that’s scary, right? You know that you’re just a passenger and it was on your own fault for going too fast, turning too sharply, braking too late, or whatever.

First time I did that in an old Porsche, it felt totally different. No fear at all. Still felt in control. I was on one of the really thin twisty bits of road around the banks of Loch Lomond – where it’s two-way traffic but the road is so narrow you can barely fit the two lanes. I hit a patch of something slippery on a tight bend. Oil, water, whatever. I don’t know. But instead of feeling out of control, the car felt like it just pivoted around the driver’s seat, around me, and I still knew exactly where it was going. Keep the wheel straight, wait for the grip to kick back in at the back, then turn into the skid and slowly guide it back with a bit of accelerator to match the speed. Instinctual, because it just felt okay.

I used to like Nightfire Red. When I was 17.

That thing is awful

Stick an Audi badge on it and 300+ bhp and it will fly off out of the showroom

Christ that’s shit

It is, but unless you live in a big city i dont think the infrastructure is there to make owning an electric car practical.

Even cities arent great for electric cars.
Given how many city dwellers either live in leasehold flats or dont have off road parking it's near impossible to have a charging point installed at home.
There are public charging points but not nearly enough to support electric becoming standard, probably couldn't even support doubling the amount on the road.

Bob wrote:

Yeah for sure in fact now is the time to buy your favourite huge engined future classic it and store it away. Bound to be an investment. There’s some rock solid advice Gav. Vectra 2.8 v6 turbo elite auto is my top tip

Oooh, a mate had the GSI with the Irmscher bodykit, got hit in the night and cracking the bumper and scufing the wheels made it a write off, was a fun little thing though

cockbeard wrote:

Bob wrote:

Yeah for sure in fact now is the time to buy your favourite huge engined future classic it and store it away. Bound to be an investment. There’s some rock solid advice Gav. Vectra 2.8 v6 turbo elite auto is my top tip

Oooh, a mate had the GSI with the Irmscher bodykit, got hit in the night and cracking the bumper and scufing the wheels made it a write off, was a fun little thing though

Slim chance that gsi might already be changing hands for ridiculous money ideally you want some thing that’s a little left field