Getting Married... - The Bear and Badger

WorKid

Yuck.

regmcfly

SO

We have a provisional booking in place

Â

Flora is going to run it through with her mum on Thursday this week, so assuming she's happy with it all, we'll be plonking down the deposit at the end of the week and will then be able to announce a date!

Unlikely

Good for you, Reg.

regmcfly

Been relatively painless so far, and we were pretty blown away by the actual venue having floor to ceiling windows with an amazing view of Edinburgh Castle from them.

Wookienopants

I expect a live twitter stream from the front there reg!

regmcfly

I am live blogging the wedding.

optimark_prime

Good stuff, Reg! :-)

Coopers Green

Regwedstock, the liveblog. Glad to hear its all going smoothly.

MattyJ

So are you sending the forum e-vites or do we all need to pm you addresses?

Aaroncupboard

Seventeen days and counting...

Bloody hell...

Rev

Your getting married?? Well done mate. All the best.

Aaroncupboard

Cheers mate, I actually can't wait...

Anyone have any tips for the grooms speech?

Rev

Thank the bridesmaids.
Say on behalf of my wife and I.
Don't be funny. You are married, you aren't allowed to be funny. Its the best man's job.
Remember to say something about how nice the in laws look. And how lovely their daughter is.
Don't accidentally punch the minister..

Aaroncupboard

Don't hit the minister...but that was my big punchline!

Ba doom tish.

Yep, don't be funny. Point taken.

Vastik

We're currently in wedding planning stagnation.

Had a tentative date set for mid-August next year (a year after the proposal) but getting the funds together is proving rather difficult even though we're doing it pretty cheaply!

Finding a nice venue that wasn't a fucking rip-off has been difficult but we may have found a solution â€“ a tiny local theatre for ceremony (seating 80 people) and a village hall for reception (with a bring-a-dish buffet and perhaps a hired-in bar to keep costs down).Â

Luckily we also know a professional wedding cake maker, craft-makers, photographers, DJs, musicians, and handle design ourselves, so that all helps too.

Unfortunately the theatre doesn't have a licence yet and is struggling to save the money to apply for one (Â£900, non-refundable if it's not successful â€“ WTF). So we're thinking we may postpone to save up more cash and give venue time to get a licence... Boo!

Rev

Ask for discount. Always ask for discount. You will be amazed how much you can get off things.

Discount.

Sasukekun

We did our whole wedding for under 3 grand. Had a great day too. It can be done, I always wonder how numpties on Don't tell the Bride manage to run out of money.

Aaroncupboard

I think our total is coming up to just under 6 grand. Not too bad and I'm pretty sure its going to be a great day!

RamSteelwood

I'm not sure what our total is heading towards (wedding is in May)...if you'd said at the start about Â£6K i'd probably have thought "how much?", now I'll probably be pleased if it comes in under 10!

we're trying to keep it sensible and as cheap as possible, but at the same time doing all the traditional bits and bobs. Â but we've also both got pretty big families so keeping the guest list at a manageable number without pissing family, friends and each other off has probably been the biggest challenge.

Mod74

Aaroncupboard wrote:

Cheers mate, I actually can't wait... Anyone have any tips for the grooms speech?

Tradition dictates you keep it brief. I made mine up on the spot, which probably showed, but who cares.

Rev

I didn't do speeches at my last wedding. I didn't have a best man. Well, my son had the ring. That was about it.
Was my dads funeral the day before, so we didn't feel it was appropriate.

pantyfire

Me and lady pantyfire where talking about marriage again the other day.
After 3 years of multiple friends and family weddings (3 in a single weekend at one point) we are thoroughly fed up of the things.Â
The grand plan was to go abroad and do it and say to people turn up if you can afford it/want to and then just pay for very close family to go too. Have the whole thing really relaxed and go straight into casual mode as soon as the ceremony was over.Â
But with lady panty's dad being disabled and unable to travel that plan looks to be out the window.Â

Her brother got married this spring at a local picturesque hotel for less than 5k. And it was very nice, brief and to the point, no hanging around and shit discos. So we are tempted to do the same but is it a bit lame to use the same venue as the brother?

We have a problem spending lots of money, not because we are cheap but because we have been together 18 years so it seems madness to spend 8-12k on some lavish wedding, we would rather use the money for more constructive things in the future like a house deposit or something.Â
It's like we have been together so long we don't feel the need to spend a lot of money on a wedding to affirm our commitment, 18 years is a hell of a lot longer than most bloody marriages.

WorKid

Only tip that matters: Enjoy The Day.

There are loads of people who you like in one place, there's food, drink, music, and everyone is in a good mood.

Best day ever.

Gamermike

pantyfire wrote:

Me and lady pantyfire where talking about marriage again the other day. After 3 years of multiple friends and family weddings (3 in a single weekend at one point) we are thoroughly fed up of the things.Â The grand plan was to go abroad and do it and say to people turn up if you can afford it/want to and then just pay for very close family to go too. Have the whole thing really relaxed and go straight into casual mode as soon as the ceremony was over.Â But with lady panty's dad being disabled and unable to travel that plan looks to be out the window.Â Her brother got married this spring at a local picturesque hotel for less than 5k. And it was very nice, brief and to the point, no hanging around and shit discos. So we are tempted to do the same but is it a bit lame to use the same venue as the brother? We have a problem spending lots of money, not because we are cheap but because we have been together 18 years so it seems madness to spend 8-12k on some lavish wedding, we would rather use the money for more constructive things in the future like a house deposit or something.Â It's like we have been together so long we don't feel the need to spend a lot of money on a wedding to affirm our commitment, 18 years is a hell of a lot longer than most bloody marriages.

My girlfriend and I have the same outlook on our future wedding and we've been together far less than you guys (i haven't proposed yet mind - but thats likely to change soon... in general, any advice on buying engagement rings by the way would be much appreciated!).

Although I am wary about the cost of a wedding can go OTT, I am happy knowing that she feels the same way about it. However, when it comes to us eventually planning the wedding, I am sure the thought of making the day that extra special will no doubt push our expected budget up.

mk64

Panty and gamer, why not jut go to a registry office and spend the allocated money on the reception?

Also on the ring front I would highly recommend speaking or finding someone who makes rings for a living and doing it that way. They are less likely to charge the markup and you can have them made more personally.

I spent 3k on my wife's engagement ring but would have cost 5/6k in a shop.

pantyfire

For me the focus, the important thing about a wedding day is the act of getting married not the party bit. Registry offices are a little soulless to me.
If we where doing the overseas thing we would go to a registry office then a day or two later her off and do a proper ceremony somewhere. But if we have to get married here then that's different.

mk64

so whats the issue? go abroad, set up a ceremony on a beach or something and fly some family over.

pantyfire

Disabled dad on her side can't go abroad.

mk64

ok, so you definitely can't go abroad. So you have to have it here. So just pick a small venue which is really nice. Invite close friends and family and arrange a bash at a restaurant or bar after. Pay as you go.

pantyfire

We are probably going to do a ceremony/breakfast in the same room thing, just a few people. No party.
We want something relaxed.
So if people want to get drunk then they can go the bar later.
Those evening wedding meals with disco bore the living daylights out of me.

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