The Write Stuff - NKOTB tribute thread
  • @Tin - Yeah, delightful. So happy about it. I've only read one of the other stories but it's sooo gooooood. 

    @g - Shh. Nobody knows it's a picture of me either (no nipples by request).
  • Dear Lord!
    Come with g if you want to live...
  • So, yup. It's available for free now. http://www.shimmerzine.com/the-mothgate-by-j-r-troughton/ Had some nice feedback and it's awesome to see certain quotes from the text done all well good and that.

    Would anyone be interested in setting up a regular writing group? I don't have any real friends who like writing... share feedback, etc? Might be a nice way for us all to get better... if anyone else is still writing.
  • I might oil the joints over summer
  • Would be fun. I'll have a lot more time then too so YEAH DO IT. Also, your fantasy stylings are teh sex.
  • So, yup. It's available for free now. http://www.shimmerzine.com/the-mothgate-by-j-r-troughton/ Had some nice feedback and it's awesome to see certain quotes from the text done all well good and that. Would anyone be interested in setting up a regular writing group? I don't have any real friends who like writing... share feedback, etc? Might be a nice way for us all to get better... if anyone else is still writing.

    That's really obscenely good, well done.

    I might be up for a writing group type thing as I keep threatening to get off my backside and get writing again.  might provide the kick up the arse I need.
  • This could be the same for me. Havent written anything for ages and even then I was only dabbling with it. Would be nice to try a bit more.
    Gamertag: aaroncupboard (like the room where you keep towels)
  • I don't have any real friends who like writing...

    We don't count??? :(

    Saw your FB post so I thought there might be a thread on the forum about it. Who knew it was all hidden in the New Kids On The Block thread (Bros fan myself). 

    I'll give it a read soon. Congrats!!! It's a real achievement, hope you're proud.
    I am a FREE. I am not MAN. A NUMBER.
  • Do you write, buddy? I mean people I see on the regular anyway - Haven't most of the Mordor crew in a loooong time, sadly. Need to live in London!

    Thanks, Tin. Really appreciate it.

    I'll mull over some ideas re: writing group. Even if it's a regular but slow thing, might be nice.
  • Nah, I don't. You just made me cry by calling me a fake friend. :(

    Just kidding. I would love to write. But I'm sure I'll make a bad writer. Loved creative writing during GCSE English and the teacher at one point thought I was good, but in hindsight it was all rubbish and I was being compared to a bunch of retards (I went to a shit school for GCSEs).
    I am a FREE. I am not MAN. A NUMBER.
  • So who else here writes? Revel and Tempy?
    I am a FREE. I am not MAN. A NUMBER.
  • Dark Soldier
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    I do, but its been a while. Might spur me on to do summat though.
  • acemuzzy
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    I have a novel idea that's an inspired cross between Vernon God Little and Faust, with a pinch of magical realism and a twist of comedy on top.

    Unfortunately I've only written the first page, and that got lost :-(.

    The step from "plausible idea for a good story" to "book written" is just too fucking huge.

    A mate of mine self-published recently, not read it yet, but kinda intrigued - and tiger I'll give your thing above a go fo sho! (Fwiw http://www.amazon.co.uk/Science-Fiction-Fantasy-Dan-Harris-Books/s?ie=UTF8&page=1&rh=n:4034595031,p_lbr_books_authors_browse-bin:Dan Harris)
  • Yeah, it's the maintaining I find brutally difficult. Hence everything I write going from "THIS WILL BE THE NOVEL" to "umm... maybe I could make this a short story, somehow?" And even finishing those is hard.

    Your mates thing looks like it's well put together, which is important. Hope it's going well for him.

    Re: writing group. Suggestions? Perhaps someone puts up 1000-2000 words ever two weeks and everyone feeds back what they like and what they didn't? Not suggesting how to fix, but suggestions about what might need fixing? If there are 4-5 people, that means only submitting every 2 months or whatever, but it's probably best to make it as manageable as possible? Thoughts...?

    Oh, and I'm writing something fishy today....
  • First draft extract - OVERWRITE.

    EDIT: In an unbelievably productive mood (in between Destiny breaks) and I've written the whole story, just under 6000 words, since yesterday morning. Boom.
    Spoiler:
  • Please send me the rest mate. Brilliant stuff.
    Sometimes here. Sometimes Lurk. Occasionally writes a bad opinion then deletes it before posting..
  • http://www.godisageek.com/2015/06/the-witcher-3-moral-compass/

    I wrote this about a recent experience on the witcher 3.
    Sometimes here. Sometimes Lurk. Occasionally writes a bad opinion then deletes it before posting..
  • Re: writing group. Suggestions? Perhaps someone puts up 1000-2000 words ever two weeks and everyone feeds back what they like and what they didn't? Not suggesting how to fix, but suggestions about what might need fixing? If there are 4-5 people, that means only submitting every 2 months or whatever, but it's probably best to make it as manageable as possible? Thoughts...?

    Sounds good to me.  Is it worth putting a folder in the B&B drop box and leaving a file in there with whatever's been written in full, rather than trying to do it off here?

    This does of course rely on me getting off my arse and writing, but it helps to have someone looking over my shoulder.  There are a few things in my head that I need to get out onto paper at some point, although I've been asked to write a story for a child first (long story) so you may end up with something aimed at a sort of 12 year old demographic if that doesn't sound too unbearable...

    Meanwhile, I'm liking the excerpt you've posted tiger, certainly left me wanting to read more; and Revel - your piece has got me considering buying a copy of Witcher 3...
  • Yeah, good idea - How can I get access to the dropbox?

    I'm definitely sold on the Witcher now. Rev's ponderings are great and the thread is full of joy. Maybe one for the summer holidays.

    Anyway - Who is in then? Me, Tin... Aaron, Tempy... Ravel Dogsborne? DS? No huge commitment at this stage, but I'd like to get this going over the next few weeks if possible.
  • I'm still in, just gotta get next week out of the way.
  • Dark Soldier
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    Yeah why not let's do this.
  • I'm in.
    Sometimes here. Sometimes Lurk. Occasionally writes a bad opinion then deletes it before posting..
  • Tempy wrote:

    I've had a quick look, and will try and have a proper read later.  I don't know how much detail you want us to go into - there are a few typos for instance which the pedant in me wants to correct, but which aren't really important in the grand scheme of things...

    As for what you've written - I thought you did a good job of hinting to and evoking a wider world without spelling it all out.  (I'm awful for giving pages of exposition, so I'll doff my cap to that.)  I certainly wanted to know more, and was engaged with the story.  I certainly enjoyed reading it.

    However, I'm guessing the point of posting isn't exclusively to be told you're awesome so...

    In terms of criticism, I guess I would say it felt a little over-written in places.  The flow sometimes feels impeded by the sheer weight of words, if that makes sense?  The other observation I'd have is that there are some examples of repetition - for instance "latticed object" 2 sentences in a row feels a little bit clunky (then followed by "object" immediately in the next).  Perhaps you need to refer to said object in some other way the second time, that none the less makes it clear that we're talking about the same thing.  (I don't know, "the device" maybe??)

    If you haven't already, try reading it out loud a couple of times, as that should help identify any problems with the flow, as well as flagging any unwanted repetition.  

    So, erm, yeah, hope that's useful, and not just patronising toss.  If you want me to do a proper red pen style review I'll try and find some time tonight/ over the weekend.
  • Yeah that's all fair, it's very much a first draft of an idea rather than anything finished, I'm very bad at honing before posting, so it was just written this morning. I'll have at it again now I know it wasn't a wasted hour or so.
  • And yeah I have a penchant for purple prose that needs obliterating. Although I'm in two minds as to the wordy stuff given what it's actually about... Thanks for taking the time to say stuff though.
  • dynamiteReady
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    Tempy wrote:

    Can't give anything close to a critique as detailed as Tin, but that excerpt reminded me of 'The Room' for some reason...
    Very much so, in fact.

    Setting and tone.

    Sombre, mysterious, foreboding, cerebral, lightly menacing...
    "I didn't get it. BUUUUUUUUUUUT, you fucking do your thing." - Roujin
    Ninty Code: SW-7904-0771-0996
  • Tempy wrote:
    Yeah that's all fair, it's very much a first draft of an idea rather than anything finished, I'm very bad at honing before posting, so it was just written this morning. I'll have at it again now I know it wasn't a wasted hour or so.

    I'm very bad at honing full stop.  (Well, my own stuff anyway...)
  • Will have a read tomorrow, Temps. Fucking knackered right now and want to do it justice.

    Had a podcast get in touch producing an audio version of The Mothgate. Only pay a tiny fee but I think I'll go with it anyway. Won't be until October or so though.
  • Can't give anything close to a critique as detailed as Tin, but that excerpt reminded me of 'The Room' for some reason... Very much so, in fact. Setting and tone. Sombre, mysterious, foreboding, cerebral, lightly menacing...

    Thanks man, that is the tone I was going for. Bloodborne hangs heavy over me. @Tin, I cleaned it up drunkenly on the bus on the way back, but if you fancy looking at it more critically I've no issue with that. I think I'm happy with a bunch of wordy choices for reasons, but i'm not beyond dissuasion.  No rush either @Tiger, but the new link is here for the slightly clearer version. No doubt it'll change over the next few days too.

    I dunno how you guys write, but I don't tend to do proper narratives, because I'm a coward. What I tend to find myself doing is 1000-2000ish word tonal things which highlight an element of a world I've fancied writing about, but I'm too lazy to put a plot together within it. Maybe one day I'll sit down and fix this, but I dunno. I think these experimental ideas might be enough for now. Tender steps and all that.

    Thumbs up for anyone who guesses what the object is.

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